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It was Easter and i wanted to go see Ciara for the day, mum brought me to her house and the journey felt short, passed me by, we got to her house and she lived on a big farm, and there were lots of people already there, bit of a blur but we ended up in a shed outside her house she owned, upstairs was a bedroom i remembered her telling me she used to live in when she was younger but didnt like it because the wind sounded scary at night so she moved back inside. Im not sure why or how but i was mostly naked and so was she, but she had a blanket wrapped around herself like a shawl. It started raining and she went down the ladder and started running outside, i called out to her asking what i should do, get dressed and follow or wait, i couldn’t hear her calling back to me the first few times, but then she half turned and shrugged and shouted ‘Im going inside anyway’ i feel confused and a little hurt but i started turning to grab my pants when my mum comes in wearing a raincoat and the rain is coming down heavy, i notice my mums car outside behind her, she tells me something and i dont hear the words but i know we need to go home. And then we are back at home, Im momentarily in the kitchen being pissy with mum for bringing me home, but then Im in my room and i start walking out to the hall when i notice a shadow slipping into mums room and i know shes in the kitchen, i try to run to the kitchen but i cant move my body. The feeling is familiar and it fills me with dread but i decide this time ill beat it, so i try to scream at it and i cant hear my voice. The sense of fear and loss is crushing and i feel weak, and certain Im about to die or go through something horrible. I start moaning ‘no.. no..’ over and over and i notice i can hear it. And Im awake, and realise Im actually saying no with my voice full of fear in my room.
First time i ever did that. First nightmare in a long time, and probably the one that i felt worst after so far. I really want her to be here. Its almost 4.20.
Anyway, that was weird, sorry, knew id forget and felt like putting it here. -
Dove hired a forensic artist to draw how women see themselves versus how others see them - the results are moving.
THIS. YOU’RE ALL MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN YOU THINK
I love this.
i cried
Dont care. Its relevant.
(via ixnay-on-the-oddk)
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(via sp1rit)
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If a state institutes a policy of banning body modifications (generally piercings) in schools, they leave “young modders” with an unpleasant choice: cease to exist as modified people, or be expelled from the school system to fend in the world without an education. To take away someone’s basic right to an education over a piercing or tattoo makes a powerful statement: the government viewpoint is that we do not in fact own our bodies or have authority over them, and that the government holds the sole rights to dictate what happens to your body.
– Shannon Larratt (via disgustingbody)(via ixnay-on-the-oddk)
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(via sp1rit)
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Lagoon Nebula
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Its my 18th today, so far its going excellently. Ciara brought me breakfast in bed.
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(via alli3pie)
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(via tattoos-n-blondes)
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I’m going to tell you what a demon once told me: It is okay to want your own happiness. It’s okay to care about yourself the most. It’s okay to do what’s healthy for YOU. When someone hits you, it’s okay to hit back and then ask them what the hell they expected. It’s okay. You are not obligated to sit there and smile and swallow every bit of shit everyone heaps on you. You are more than furniture, you’re more than window dressing, you’re not their shiny toy. You’re human, and you have the right to say “That was shitty of you”. You have a right to say “Let me feed that back to you; tell me, how does it taste?” You have a right to protest your own mistreatment and set boundaries for respectful interactions. The rest of the world doesn’t realize you have this right, and they will act offended and appalled when you exercise it, but it is yours.
– SonneillonV (via femmefilth)(via cannabiskitties)
